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Hey, 

This first post will be a bit lengthy, an opportunity to spew all of my thoughts onto paper (sort of). 

To cut to the chase - I've been using Testosterone Enanthate from the age of 19 to 27, along the way I've added in various compounds (dbol, tren, anavar), for the last 3 years I've been running on about 4-500mg/test e/week solely. 

Do I compete? Absolutely not. Would you look at me and be impressed? Absolutely not. As a gym rat you'd know I probably use gear, but to the general public I'm just someone who has too many protein shakes. 

I've been wanting to come off test for years, but a crazy work schedule, a horribly vain persona and the fear of the unknown has held me back. BUT that's now changing. 

To amplify matters - I have never had blood work taken, never run a PCT (or did once when I was 20 and then went back on gear 6 weeks later), and never run HCG. Fantastic concoction of fuckery, right? 

I've searched forums for bellends in a similar position to me but have found very few - I'm hoping this running diary of my recovery (if any) will serve as a good stop for others who have been equally wreckless with their bodies. 

 

Some current stats

5'9

85kg

14% bf 

Bench 140kg, squat 190kg

 

Any questions fire through, my last jab was 3 weeks ago, clomid and nolva was started yesterday at 25mg/40mg respectively. I plan to run the clomid for 4-6 weeks, the nolva for 6-8 with the dose dropping to 20mg after 2 weeks. 

 

I will be getting a basic testosterone blood test completed next week with a full hormone check at the end of July. I'll keep you posted. 

 

Alex 

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So...

3 weeks in and I believe any changes at this point will probably be self-manufactured, but they're there nonetheless. 

I've had a headache for the past 2 days, quite irritable and mild anxiety when left alone with my thoughts for too long. 

In terms of gym performance, I haven't yet noticed a dip but my training has been so inconsistent for the last year that it often fluctuates anyway, but I'll keep you posted. I imagine the real slump will come in 4-6 weeks time. 

My balls are the size of a very plump grape, but slightly longer, which is unchanged from when I'm cycle. 

Moderators - if talking to yourself is frowned upon, please let me know. 

Alex.

 

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9 minutes ago, boutye911 said:

Good luck for the months ahead chap. 

Will you be using hcg, hmg?

Would definitely get a blood test to see where you are currently at. 

Would bump the clomid to 100mg per day and keep the nolva at 20mg. 

Cheers mate, appreciate it. 

No, I wasn't sure on the absolute value after being shut down for so long. My plan was to run the clomid/nolva, get bloods then start from there and decide if HCG/hmg is needed. 

Thanks for the advice on clomid, I had read a few studies that showed a higher dose wasn't necessarily needed (and given my level of current anxiety I didn't want to amplify the effects where possible). I'll up the clomid for 2 weeks ?.

From your experience, would using HCG now 3 weeks after last injection + starting PCT prove useful or is it, at this point, a bit too late? 

 

Alex 

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Ime you are more likely recover than not. *opinion only* Before you attempt the pct get exogenous test use down to a trt dose. This prepares your body for what follows, that being normality.

I’d personally class a trt dose as half a mil every 10-12 days ish

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Drop all gear 

Wait a month 

Start hcg at 2000iu eod and run it for 20 days (10 shots in total) run an AI with this in order to keep oestrogen levels within range (low end) since we don't want any negative feedback from elevated hormones 

3 days after last shot 

Start the protocol ITT 

 

6 weeks after your final serm get this bloodwork done 

https://www.medichecks.com/tests/male-hormone-check

 

I believe the above to be your best chance at recovery however I am with @Sasnak in that after 7 years of shutdown without HCG you will more than likely be severely underproducing testosterone if not perminantly hypogonadal

Your leydig cells have done literally nothing in almost a decade 

 

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Fair play for admitting what an ignorant tit you've been, some people go all their lives thinking what they're doing is okay.

As above, PCT protocol, HCG etc, and just pray you can get your bollocks working again. Might be a life of TRT on the cards if not, which isn't necessarily the end of the world and is possibly a good thing in the long run, it's just a pain in the arse to be doing it when you're young and shouldn't have needed it originally.

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I'm fairness to the op, I would follow swole trolls advice first. 

 

Worst case you have to be on trt. If that's the case, use this as an opportunity to keep on top of your health, drop your bodyfat down and start looking and feeling the way you want to, which is the reason you/us tend to get into aas. 

 

If you haven't the time, then at Keady look at cardio and a full body workout a week and do all the things that you sound like you know you should do. 

 

If you don't mind me saying so, I think you're being slightly hard on yourself and perhaps suffering from depression based on your post. We are all critical of ourselves, but you're young and hopefully healthy so it's easier for you to start making changes now than it is to bury your head or start ten years from now. 

 

Do you still enjoy the gym? 

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Hi all, 

Appreciate the responses, rather than quoting each of you I've taken all of your advice on board and appreciate it - currently sourcing some HCG (typical my usual source is out for the foreseeable). 

@stewedw mild depression potentially, however, bags of resilience so I'm fully aware this is just a low period. To be fair, each week I'd feel quite low injecting myself just to 'feel', naively, normal (which is anything but ?). On an unrelated note my hairloss has stepped up a gear over the last 12 months which has definitely not helped my mood ?. I should probably run a Rogaine thread alongside this one for those interested in this particular battle lol. 

Still enjoy the gym, still enjoy the value of a healthy lifestyle - the latter being my primary focus for now, if I'm going to lose muscle and strength I at the very least want to gain some mobility and overall health improvements in the meantime. 

I've just ordered a full hormone test - will post the results next week (will probably make for some interesting reading). I'm sure I'll have some general updates before then. 

Alex.

 

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6 hours ago, RoadToRecovery247 said:

Hi all, 

Appreciate the responses, rather than quoting each of you I've taken all of your advice on board and appreciate it - currently sourcing some HCG (typical my usual source is out for the foreseeable). 

@stewedw mild depression potentially, however, bags of resilience so I'm fully aware this is just a low period. To be fair, each week I'd feel quite low injecting myself just to 'feel', naively, normal (which is anything but ?). On an unrelated note my hairloss has stepped up a gear over the last 12 months which has definitely not helped my mood ?. I should probably run a Rogaine thread alongside this one for those interested in this particular battle lol. 

Still enjoy the gym, still enjoy the value of a healthy lifestyle - the latter being my primary focus for now, if I'm going to lose muscle and strength I at the very least want to gain some mobility and overall health improvements in the meantime. 

I've just ordered a full hormone test - will post the results next week (will probably make for some interesting reading). I'm sure I'll have some general updates before then. 

Alex.

 

Fair play to ya mate. I've been on for years now so in the same situation as yaself...although I do monitor my health very closely

As said...you've got a tough road ahead. I've stayed on because of low natty test levels and peesonally couldnt face or want to come off...at least not for a few years anyway

Good luck bro

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5 minutes ago, stuey99 said:

Fair play to ya mate. I've been on for years now so in the same situation as yaself...although I do monitor my health very closely

As said...you've got a tough road ahead. I've stayed on because of low natty test levels and peesonally couldnt face or want to come off...at least not for a few years anyway

Good luck bro

I imagine mine will forever be fairly low now. I'm completely at ease with potentially needing TRT for the rest of my life, it's more fertility and overall health I'm concerned with at the moment. 

Fertility is an odd one - again I'm at ease if that doesn't fix itself, self inflicted so can't moan even though I've always wanted children. It's more the closure it would offer knowing either way I'm probably looking forward to most. 

Side note - trained earlier, pumps felt fine, still hate pull ups with a passion, definitely sweated less than usual, not sure if related. 

There was also an hour on the radio where they were discussing baldness and a potential cure... I'm going to take this as a positive sign that my life is in reform lol. 

Alex.

 

 

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Thought I'd include a current photo of what I look like to compare with in 3-6 months time. Again, hoping it proves useful for others in my situation to balance expectations. 

Since moving to London (October) I try it hit the gym 2-4 times a week, prior to this I was going 4/5 days semi consistently, have lost around 8lbs (of muscle, if anything I'm also less lean, fabulous) and 3/4 inch from arms (don't train them directly anymore). That's since moving to London, not since last jab lol. 

 

Alex.

Snapchat-1562604699.jpg

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11 hours ago, Jiminy Cricket said:

I can top the 8 years with 10 on. Now have 2 kids. Recovery will take time and patience. Here was my thread when I faced the same as you :

 

 

Ah, that's really interesting and good to hear! Perhaps there is hope. 

Quick question - can you remember how long it took to gain back 'volume' in your testicles? 

As far as you're aware, did the long term use cause any underlying health issues? I've booked for a full private health check (heart/bloods/whatever else is important), unsure if the unregulated use, particularly presumably elevated estrogen and slightly high blood pressure, has done any hidden damage in the background. 

 

Alex.

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Hi all, quick question. 

My last injection was either the 5th or 6th June, PCT started 27th. 

Would there still be exogenous test in my system now? Is there much value in taking the full hormone test now or should I wait? Last injection was 500mg test e. 

 

Thanks in advance,

 

Alex 

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1 hour ago, RoadToRecovery247 said:

Hi all, quick question. 

My last injection was either the 5th or 6th June, PCT started 27th. 

Would there still be exogenous test in my system now? Is there much value in taking the full hormone test now or should I wait? Last injection was 500mg test e. 

 

Thanks in advance,

 

Alex 

You can work out what your levels would have been on your last shot here

https://steroidcalc.com/

 

Then work out using the halflife of the test ester how much you would have left in your system by now

  • Testosterone Propionate: 0.8 days
  • Testosterone Phenylpropionate: 1.5 days
  • Testosterone Isocaproate: 4.0 days
  • Testosterone Enanthate: 4.5 days
  • Testosterone Cypionate: 5.0 days
  • Testosterone Decanoate: 7.5 days
  • Testosterone Undecanoate: 20.9 days
  • Trenbolone Acetate: 1.0 days
  • Trenbolone Enanthate: 4.5 days
  • Masteron Propionate: 0.8 days
  • Masteron Enanthate: 4.5 days
  • Nandrolone Phenylpropionate: 1.5 days
  • Nandrolone Decanoate: 7.5 days
  • Equipoise: 14.0 days
  • Primobolan Oral: 5 hours
  • Primobolan Injectable: 4.5 days
  • Halotestin: 7 hours
  • Anadrol: 14 hours
  • Dianabol: 5 hours
  • Turinabol: 16 hours
  • Winstrol Oral: 8 hours
  • Winstrol Injectable: 1.0 days
  • Anavar: 10 hours
  • Superdrol: 10 hours

 

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Couple of updates: 

Sex - Couldn't finish with my girlfriend last night, 90% sure this is more just me other thinking it as opposed to being biologically unable to (or physiologically, which ever is best suited). Who knows, when she buggers off to work I'll see if manual labour works lol.

Blood test - 4 lancets later and I still couldn't fill the test tube, first time ever (veteran from previous STD kits during my single stint). Called to ask for another one and they said to send what I did manage to get first and if they can't produce results they'll send another one out - waste of time but it is what it is. 

Training - legs Saturday felt great, couldn't gauge strength due to lighter weights to hit a bit more volume but I enjoyed the session. Training upper body later today including bench so I'll let you know how that goes strength wise.

General - Feeling fine, muscles are feeling 'empty' but I guess this is just me readjusting to the reduced glycogen stores and whatever other goodies test helps enhance. 

 

Alex.

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4 hours ago, RoadToRecovery247 said:

Couple of updates: 

Sex - Couldn't finish

Are you taking any prescription meds like anti depressants? 

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