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Sexual Tyrannosaurus
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1,552 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
My 80year old neighbour who is a complete *unt has put a garden fork sticking out of in her garden at the point when my retriever jumps her bushes along with bricks. He doesn't do it often only when our gates are locked to keep our 2year in.

Ill put up a piccy later but this really is kinda evil IMO.
 

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Sexual Tyrannosaurus
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1,552 Posts
Discussion Starter · #8 ·
No I havent. She hates my guts for what reason I dont know but then she hates everyone in my street and everyone hates her. She reports those in my street for working out of their garages, calls the dog warden and back stabs her only friend whom Im friendly with.

She has a dodgy past concerning child care, seems she was a minder 15 years ago for a couple in my street and they found their kid tied to a bed while she went on errands, so you have an idea of her...
 

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Banned
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322 Posts
pariah said:
No I havent. She hates my guts for what reason I dont know but then she hates everyone in my street and everyone hates her. She reports those in my street for working out of their garages, calls the dog warden and back stabs her only friend whom Im friendly with.

She has a dodgy past concerning child care, seems she was a minder 15 years ago for a couple in my street and they found their kid tied to a bed while she went on errands, so you have an idea of her...
she is evil..are there any loose paving stones on your street you can bury her under?
 

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Gym Addict
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238 Posts
I would

a) knock on her her door and explain not so nicely that if my dog injured it's self on the fork then she would be liable for the damage, explaining in great detail the cost of vet bills. If she was unwilling to pay for treatment, i would then also explain that i was willing to take payment in kind and that she "really really" didn't want to pi$$ me off unless she wanted her life to become a living hell.

B) if said fork didn't disappear immediatly I would steal it and keep stealing them, she would soon get the message or spend a fortune in fork's! but don't get me wrong i am not a thief i would pay for the fork in dog poop which i would throw into her garden nightly as payment.If she was a perticually "avid" gardener she may also find her prize "roses" (or enter any other much loved plant here) got a little midnight feeding with glyphosate.

I would also invest in a camera which i would set up to monitor her putting the forks in place as the RSPCA would be very interested, i would also to ring them and ask thier advice, namely becaue that way i would be covered if my dog did hurt its self as i'd have evidence it was done on purpose. They where quite helpful when my neighbour threatened to poison my cat for sitting on his car.

Tbh though i can be a pretty scary girl and few people tend to cross me after stage a) has been conducted... im boss says i have a "pi$$ with me and die" attitude which is apparently not very conductive to a working enviroment... oh well guess im lucky im one of the few people in the country who can do my job eh?
 

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John
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1,104 Posts
why dont you jump over the fence smear your poo on her windows, take the fork smear your poo on the handle and place it proper way leaning against her wall ie. forks pointing down so when she picks it up to do it again she gets your poo on her hands, thats worse than dog poo when its someone else's
 
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