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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Down this road in a gym far away,

A young man was once heard to say,

"no matter what i do, my legs won't grow"

He tried leg extensions, leg curls, and leg presses too,

Trying to cheat, these sissy workouts he'd do.

From the corner of the gym where the big men train,

Through a cloud of chalk and the midst of pain

Where the noise is made with big forty fives,

A deep voice bellowed as he wrapped his knees.

A very big man with legs like trees.

Laughing as he snatched another plate from the stack

Chalking his hands and monstrous back said,

"boy, stop lying and don't say you've forgotten,

the trouble with you is you ain't been SQUATTIN'. "


We've come to squat so run and hide

You bicep freaks must step aside

Just take your sissy selves elsewhere

You'll turn your heads but still you'll stare

Go right ahead and pay attention

Glimpse into this strange dimension

Yeah you're still weak and never grow

This world of pain you'll never know

Your shouts upon the leg-press, phony!

Noodle legs like macaroni

Some day I hope you'll understand

And wrench free from the poser band

Puny curl bars, leave this spot

The rack named for the mighty SQUAT

5% off myprotein MP269006
2,421 Posts
Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Curling in the squat rack

It was my leg day

I thought "time to get these quads swole"

When who should I see

With skinny legs like a pole?

Big bis, big chest

Not much of a back

But some douche in a wife beater

Curlilng in the squat rack

He was a manlet

Was around my age

This is one of those scenarios

That makes me want to rage

So I tapped him on the shoulder

In between a set

Probably shouldn't have done that

He was covered in sweat

"how many more sets do you have"

I politely said

He looked me up and down

"boy you want to end up dead?"

I was shocked at his answer

It filled me with fury

I gave him the death stare

He ran off in a hurry

So I loaded up some weight

Got that bar on my back

And thus ends the story

Of curling in the squat rack

5% off myprotein MP269006
2,421 Posts
Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Bench Press

Put on that weight

Get on that bench

Last guy didn't clean it

Don't worry about that stench

Grip that bar

Arch that back

Unrack that weight

and prepare to get jacked

It's the king of upper body exercises

You do it to get swole

If it's not in your chest routine,

that routine ain't whole

If you want a big bench

Work those shoulders, tris and chest

When you do that

Your bench will be the best

Incline, flat

Their all great

Doesn't really matter

Just press that weight

So tuck those elbows

Plant those feet

Bring it down to your chest boy

You better not cheat

So if you want a big chest

If you want to get swole

When it comes to chest day

That bench better be your goal
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