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I ****ing love this sketch. I watch it a lot. I love that brief awkward look they give each other. I love everything they both do especially peepshow
Why? Stuck in a rut, bro, even with what you watch… just like your drinking.

Your time will come where you need to enter detox and then residential rehab. Need to lose your job and tenancy first. You don’t to be homeless. It’s not nice when you’re an addict, son. Those Winters be mean.

Your health will deteriorate….even then, poor health, unemployed and homelessness might not be enough. Might even be dead by then.

You don’t want to be homeless. It’s not nice when you’re an addict, son. Those Winters be mean…. you’ve got it all to come 👍
 

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To be fair I think when it’s serious, they only feel good once they’ve had the drink.
When it gets serious it’s more to do with stopping the shakes, feeling shit and seizure prevention.

Even when it’s serious they still suffer seizures. Only one seizure away from end of life. Cracking odds 💪

@Jackoffblades has got all this to come. Flip dat coin brohomo. Clock is ticking and it ain’t in your favour
 

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It happens over time I never intended it to be this way. It took a lot of effort a lot of drinking for me to become an alcoholic. Mental health issues, isolation, wanting to feel alive due to my past is a big thing for me, lots of factors comes into play. It's just I can say I don't want to not drink anymore starting from tomorrow but the more amount you drink the more your brain relies on the those chemicals even to the point of stopping producing adrenaline and dopamine. I'll know I'll wake up depressed as anything and I'll have little energy to shake it off I can't force myself to get up and go matter what I think. It's a vicious cycle but one that I know for a fact I'm going to beat
Let’s just say, hypothetically, that you stop drinking and get a year abstinent under your belt. Whatever these things from your past are, whatever your ‘mental health issue’ is (millions of people function with mental health issues)you will say to yourself and people around you ‘can’t fcking believe I gave my past & alcohol so much power’.

Whatever your name is, your past, sobriety, non-drinking related depression will not kill you. Alcohol will. And, stop fcking banging on about dopamine and adrenaline.

I hope you get sacked from your job (if you actually have one) and get booted out your flat as it will be the biggest gift you ever receive & I think it‘a what you need.
 

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How much booze would it take for you to suck me off?
I heard a story about a guy (we’ll say it happened in Somerset). He was a pisshead. Heterosexual.

35 odd years ago so stuff like Carlsberg export (known as ‘Hoff’) used to be about £1-20/£1-30 a pint.

He got chatting to another guy stood at the urinals. Offered to suck him off for a fiver 😂






Another 4 pints so worth it really 🌈
 

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Right now in ****ed no love is going to save me from this hell. Iv drank nearly 2litres of whiskey
Spelling 9/10 considering your 2 litres in…..and, 1st thing you think of doing is coming on UKM to post to a load of guys who have offered help (and continue in doing so) which you continually bat it back & talk utter shite

Your lack of effort to engage/liaise with a local community drug agency & attend regularly and then follow up with detox/residential rehab speaks volumes. It’s what you need.

You also need to give up your job, room/tenancy and go to a rehab far away from Manchester (where I believe you are) and tell the drug worker that ‘Ravenscourt’ in Bognor Regis is where you want to go. They will remove all those layers and call you out on your bullshit, your denial and tell you how it is. Then request to go to Weymouth aftercare centre for 2nd/3rd stage.

Being serious about changing your life means ‘you’ll go to whatever lengths’ to do so…..are you willing to do that? I’m not interested in your reply, it’s just lip service from you, boyo.

And, before you start replying ‘I know’….. if you know so much how come you’re in the situation you are and refusing to do something about it?
 
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