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  1. 21 likes
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    Translating to: "You must be hot, interesting, rich, drive a nice car, own a big house and have no kids even though i'm exceptionally average looking even with loads of makeup, live in a council house with 3 kids from 4 different dads and expect you to pay for everything"
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    Method: - Cut to 8-10% body fat (200-300mg Test) - Bulk in a small surplus until you reach 12-14% body fat (Test/Nandrolone/Eq/Tren/Anadrol/Dianabol) - Rinse and repeat - Reach your desired level of muscle mass - Cut to 8-10% body fat (Test/Tren/Masteron/Winstrol/Anavar/Halotestin) - Maintain and cruise intermittently at your own disgression depending on blood work Tips: - Track calorie intake daily, the more accurate you are with tracking/adhering to your plan, the better the results will be - Stick to a routine focusing on 1-3 compound lifts per muscle per week, track your lifts and aim to add weight or reps each week while you're bulking, reduce the volume slightly and focus on maintaining your strength while using proper form while you're cutting - Experiment with different compounds and doses until the you find what works best for you, sides/results will vary from person to person, I'm not advising you to run all of the compounds listed above, they're just ideas, ramp up your doses over time - Take pictures of yourself under the same lighting regularly for reference purposes, pictures don't lie - Fat burners have their place but they are quite taxing on the body and can cause side effects, don't use them unnecessarily, save them for when your weight starts to plateau towards the end of a cut or don't use them at all - Make a training log on the forum, it'll keep you accountable - Your mileage may vary, you might gain/lose muscle/fat faster/slower than your mate - Do regular cardio regardless of whether you're bulking or cutting - Get a majority of your calories from 'clean' non-processed food with the occasional treat - Different macro splits suit different people, experiment and find what works best for you, high carb, low carb, keto, carb cycling etc - Have all necessary ancillaries on hand at all times just in case - Get blood work done at least twice (ideally 4) times a year, be prepared to drop compounds or come down to a cruise when necessary, think longevity - Accept that hunger is part of getting lean, nuking your appetite with stimulants 24/7 is more trouble than it's worth, keep yourself busy and you'll soon forget you're hungry - There is no 'best lab', there are labs putting out inaccurately dosed gear and there are labs putting out accurately dosed gear, read the forum to see which labs are being recommended
  6. 14 likes
    Haven't posted in here for a while but did my first comp of the season yesterday, the WFF UK Open, athletic class, so thought I'd throw up some pics. And this was the day before
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    So disappointed at this thread I came in with a pound coin hoping I might win some gear
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    @joelafitness Hi Joel, enjoyed the video and great editing. As you are only 17 I imagine your mum to be quite young? perhaps late 30s? I know the boys of UKM would be a whole lot more supportive of your bodybuilding goals if you could supply them with some recent holiday pics of your mum? or even some nudes of her in the bath? keep up the good work. Regards, John
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    DONE! felt good today, did some standing diamond push ups, felt nice and limber and thought f**k it, grabbed matey (the gym owner, no one else in) who's also torn his pec off before and had him spot me from 160kg bencher to 20kg for a triple they told me i wouldnt bench til august and here i am 4.5 months ahead of schedule benching pain free (10 weeks post pec reattachment surgery) did all my other usual workout but forget all that shite, i got my bench back im not going to get ahead of myself and start benching 3x per week, instead going to continue with the 20 rep set program (until it kills me) benching once per week and work on getting 20 pain free reps on the bench with the bar then ill start using a more conventional rep and set pattern so thats a wrap, "Except for my kid being born, this is the greatest night in the history of my life" slight exaggeration (plus i dont have a kid) but im well chuffed with this ill put together a tom finn style compilation video of my pre rupture, rupture and recovery journey back up to the empty bar at some point and slam it in here but aside from that we done hope you enjoyed it as much as i didnt and ill also compile what i believe to be the most effective method based on my experience and bullet point it all in here so that anyone else reading this can not only see the timeline in the video i put together but also filter the chaff from the wheat in terms of what to use and what approach to take again i usually f**k this up at the end of all my logs so apologies if youre missed but my head's like a sieve EDIT : its not letting me tag anyone, ill get you all in a later post when the website stops pranging out
  11. 12 likes
    Country full of lazy fat f**ks here in the UK, and that ain't changing any time soon. To be fair, I guess some of them Ruskie birds would turn out to be catfish. 'Hazel' eyes and interests include cuddling and massage?? I think you want Grindr mate!
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    this is why the forums need : A / a judge dredd type approach to moderation B/ an age verification check to make sure the poster is over 10 C/ a short IQ test to make sure the poster has a mental capacity higher than a grapefruit
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    Yesterday when I was in the shower I cupped my hands and peed into them, I stood there holding 8 ounces of my own pee, I looked at it, felt it's warmth and then unclasped my hands And as I watched the golden liquid flow down the drain I thought to myself what if... what if I would have drank that pee?
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    In response to the many threads I'm either tagged in or stumble across on exercise selection, macro layout and drug or supplement stacks i figured I'd nip it all in the bud for those that are searching for the secret as the real secret to success in your chosen endeavor is genetics genetics will ALWAYS reign supreme we can manipulate things and be the best we can be but there is no magic drug stack or diet or special type of one arm machine fly on the smith that hits the inner upper outter pec for maximal development that is going to blow you up beyond that which a simplistic approach will and in most cases will usually hinder progress by getting tunnel visioned on one aspect or over complicating your training as Martin Berkhan once termed "Fuckarounditis" which simply put means if your legs arnt growing from squats then its your diet or progression not the exercise Training the simple fact of it is the majority of your mass is going to be accrued by hitting the major barbell movements with progression whilst eating in a caloric surplus and getting plenty of rest, that's it! no amount of leg extensions is going to blow your quads up, a simple 5x5 or 3x10 or 4x8 or what ever rep range you prefer so long as there is progression is going to put 90% of your size on. Food now while this is one of the cornerstones of your growth people do over complicate this aspect of fitness goals particularly when cutting your fat loss is dictated by calories. end of you could get fat eating broccoli, brown rice and chicken breasts and you could get to dangerously low levels of body fat eating chocolate bars that's not to say food selection doesnt play a role in building or preserving muscle mass but people really over complicate this * 1g of protein per lb of body weight is slight overkill in most cases but it's easy and works for either cutting or bulking so that's that * at least 25-30% of your calories to come from fats * fill the rest with carbs if you are bulking increase your calories by 10% if you are cutting decrease your calories by 10% when this stops working up the cardio or decrease calories further if cutting. make healthier choices like trying to eat more complex carbs, plenty of fruits and vegetables and minimal processed foods allow yourself a percentage of your calories to eat anything you'd like, if you eat 3000 calories per day then have 500 of them eating anything you like (chocolate, cakes, crisps ect) this will help with cravings, prevent binging and stops you from being a social reject that takes tupperware to family dinners or nights out with friends Gear for those that use gear, i've quoted Dante Trudel many times and i firmly believe this: "if you cant get massive on a gram of test alone then your diet or training is off" no amount of deca or tren will suddenly make you explode, sure these compounds have their uses and each hormone brings its own set of benefits to the plate but by and large testosterone alone can cover you in terms of PED's and achieving your size, strength or leanness goals and if you arnt getting big results off test alone then these other compounds wont be the secret as you can build muscle naturally so if you cant whilst on high dose test you're either a mass monster or your training and or diet is s**t Supplements finally over the counter supplements... forget it! unless its for a deficiency in your diet then its not doing much of anything other than leaning out your wallet pre workouts can bring something to the plate but only when used sparingly otherwise you not only become dependent but they dont give you an edge in your training but still jack up your coritisol creatine, beta alanine and citrulline malate are all promising on paper but i've experimented with all of them on many many occasions with many variables as well as keeping things consistent in diet, rest and training and i saw zero improvement there is a case for non responders but even those that respond we're talking fractional benefit which again isnt going to be the missing link as to why you dont look like your favorite youtuber, fitness model or bodybuilder your money is better spent on food and if you are enhanced then you have PED's which are the only supplements worth using (bar those with dietary deficiencies) to simplify even further: 1.Train with progression, if you squatted 140kg last week, try to squat 142.5kg this week 2. Eat in a surplus for as long as possible, all this frequent, short term bulking crap is hindering your progress, any time you are cutting you are NOT building muscle 3.Sleep plenty, ideally without an alarm 4.Over the counter supplements are only good for dietary deficiencies, not muscle building 5.if you take drugs then treat them like any other aspect of your approach, with progression, if you are squatting more than last training cycle, eating more than last training cycle and you weigh more then you can probably bump up your drugs all factors should rise in tandem, dont ever heavily rely on the drugs alone, if anything food and training needs looking at before the drugs do. so stop over complicating all this and remember that even if you are in the perfect environment for building muscle it takes time! and again, GENETICS ALWAYS REIGN SUPREME so chances are you're not doing anything wrong, it's just that the other guy has better genetics than you and responds better to training and or drugs
  15. 12 likes
    Spend your time learning correct spelling and grammar rather than worry about AAS testing with army CDT
  16. 12 likes
    Haha this. Am I the only one on the forum that doesn't feel the need to get smashed and fvcked up on drugs to enjoy your weekend?
  17. 12 likes
    Did the Syrians not wonder why ALL the Russians had gone out for the night?...
  18. 11 likes
    Not a nice topic for us men,but its a fact of life.Two years ago my brother who is 4 years younger than me had a high PSA reading.He chose to ignore it for over a year bad move he has just finished radiotherapy for prostate cancer.Earlier this year my other brother who is 6 years younger than me also had a high PSA reading after being concerned that his brother had cancer got tested. He is waiting for an operation because he has prostate cancer.Thats 2 out of 3 of us so get yourself a Test and act on it guys,it wont go away.By the way i,ve been tested and my PSA reading was ok.
  19. 11 likes
    The girl in this fantasy is really you, isn't it
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    I was getting bullied at School. I was 14 at the time and there was a group of lads who went round picking on one individual at a time and it was my turn. As often the case, it was a "ringleader" with a load of so called "friends" who sucked up to him for the sole reason of not getting bullied themselves. The problem I had is he had gone through the whole puberty thing early and he was a physically imposing "man", whereas I was still very much a kid even though we were the same age. Someone suggested that I should punch him when he wasn't expecting it but I initially thought that was cowardly until he burnt me with a cigarette so I figured that he had already ripped up any rule book. I waited round a corner for him, absolutely terrified and when he walked round I landed him with the biggest right hand I could muster. Fortunately the timing was spot on and he went down like a sack of potatoes. He lay there on the floor with blood pouring from his mouth and nose and I told him that was just for starters if he ever came near me again. He never did. 30 years later I still shudder thinking how scared I was at the time.
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    I did a series of armed robberies with me and my surfer mates, then I ran off to Australia, but a cop found me and I tried to escape by surfing the biggest wave in the world. Oh wait, no that was Point Break starring Keanu Reaves and Patrick Swayze. My mistake.
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    Rainwater collection is subject to state laws in the US. Some states consider rainwater to be public property, so anyone collecting it on private land is effectively stealing something that belongs to everyone. Colorado is one example. Others have laws on blocking or diverting waterways. Some states actively encourage citizens to collect rainwater, and even give tax-breaks to people who do The celebrated case of Gary Harrington who supposedly went to jail for 'collecting rainwater' is another piece of nonsense. He actually built a 6m high dam across a stream that ran through his property and used it to create an artificial lake stocked with trout for paying customers. He was sent to jail because he refused to get a water rights permit, and insisted on going to court because he insisted that his property rights trumped state laws on water. In the UK, rainwater harvesting is encouraged by the government, and the only laws around it are building regs type rules.
  23. 10 likes
    Hi all! I am 24 year old female in London, 5'3 (162cm), 65kg at the moment. I've always been pretty average looking and average at everything else, but over the past year I've realised just how much I can accomplish by just DOING IT. I've managed to do such cool s**t after I stopped making excuses in my life, (in my career and overall happiness), and now it's time to change my body. I can't stay motivated unless I feed myself with information. So, in February I started to read anything and everything scientific about training and nutrition. The more I found out about the food industry the more I realised how I really need to stop eating red meat, which then has been moving more into plant based proteins. This I find kind of surprising, a bit challenging but also rewarding as the economic consequences of meat eating are just so dire. On the other hand, it's a bit challenging for a newbie to try and find all protein in plant based foods (I do eat fish and eggs, sometimes chicken.) I supplement with fish oil, whey protein powder, probiotics and L-Glutamine. My training I started by bulking, because I know myself well enough that if I start to restrict myself by leaning out first, I will probably fail. I did about 1850 kcal a day, working out intensely with heavy weights 5 times aweek. I focus on the bikini muscle groups, so delts, booty, legs, lats... did bulking for 8 weeks and now I've done my first week of calorie deficit of 1600 kcal and adding a bit more cardio. Training will still be high intensity and weightlifting-focused. I've never really been on a (successful) cut so this should be interesting... Here's some before and afters of my 8 week program which I made myself by mixing and matching my favourite movements. I watch a lot of YouTube (Amanda Bucci, Lauren Drain etc) where I get new ideas to keep my workouts fresh. Fitness can be pretty lonely for someone as introvert as myself, in a city like London, so hoping to get some support and find likeminded people on this forum.
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    Wtf who lets these sort of people on this Forum.
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    Are you thinking of oral willy or injecting it in to the glutes?
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    A few things I'm not so keen on but don't take it personally. 1, As said before, beta feet. 2, The beading around the skirting, I bloody hate it when folk do that, remove the skirting and do the job properly!! Argh. 3, It looks like someone attempted to fit it properly and got halfway through the door frame before deciding it's hard work. 4, Tidy it all up with some decoratorors caulking, including on the beading. 5, That wire and , just NO!!! 6, 'Not to mention the dirty mirror lol.'- Sparkey 13/04/2017
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    It still baffles me how people can be on their phone whilst at the gym, distractions like that are a fantastic reason for a sh1tty workout.
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    well that's a minute of my life I won't get back.
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    Putting on my detective hat, if it was a "he" you'd probably say "he" and not "they", so I think you're trying to hide the fact that it's a "she". What has your ex girlfriend done and does your "surprise" involve an axe?
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    If you feel that excessive violence and rape are positive then yes.
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    I talked to a Russian girl about this, she had an interesting response: "Brit girls are stupid lazy party goers, only this"
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    I have a morning ritual that I need to share. I call it "the terminator". First I crouch down in the shower in the classic "naked terminator traveling through time" pose. With my eyes closed I crouch there for a minute, visualizing either Arnold or the guy from the second movie (not the chick in the third one because that one sucked) and I start to hum the terminator theme. Then I slowly rise to a standing position and open my eyes. It helps me to proceed through my day as an emotionless, cyborg badass. The only problem is if the shower curtain sticks to my terminator leg. It ruins the fantasy.
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    For 1 million I would bum my Dad on TV, straight after Eastenders.
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    thanks for the post @Mayzini what do you think more MOD's would bring to the forum do you feel that threads are left not moderated? i agree i have plenty on my plate but my day job is on a computer and i know it sounds silly but posting and moderating the forum is a welcome break sometimes.... i will agree that we have MODs who are not active so should be removed and then replacements brought in from the current members this is something i will bring up with @Lorian i will admit gone are the days where i worry about upsetting people if they have broken forum rules, a new found rule for me is to not debate or be tolerant with stupid people
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    Farther Christmas died for our sins and this is how we repay him.
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    OK here are my pictures. To be honest I'm not happy with them. I don't think the lighting has helped but I shan't have time to take more tomorrow as we are going to see my mum for lunch and shes a 3 hour drive away, so no change of getting my daughter to take more before we go. I am pleased with the results and had it not been for hurting my back at the start of the challenge I think I could have done even better. anyway:
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    Couldnt agree more. I actually said to a kid the other day because he was sitting on the lat pull down machine on his phone for about 5 mins after every set: "excuse me mate.....you got many sets left on your phone" He didnt know what to do. Didnt say it in an aggressive way but i think he got the message.......probably on his phone too
  42. 9 likes
    EDL is a joke anyway, I spent a few years in Luton watching these marches every year, fu**ing disgrace to the country if you ask me.
  43. 9 likes
    I get them from @AncientOldBloke's freezer, last time I got one that even came with stuffing, it made me feel like God.
  44. 9 likes
    Well, looking at what you have I'd suggest a test, mast and dbol cycle
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    God damn, today was a difficult one, I was so bloody tired since adding the hour of fasted LISS pre-training. I could barely muster the energy to string a sentence together or respond coherently to an email until I had my post workout meal. I've caught the bodybuilding bug again for sure. I had been training half assed for well over a year before starting this cut and diet and since getting everything under control and working hard and smart and seeing daily changes in my physique I'm really enjoying it again. So much so that I'm going to hire a coach for my gaining phase when I'm back from my holiday and try taking things to the next level. I've already had a chat with the coach I had in mind and he's happy to take me on board. Exciting times ahead.
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    Thanks mate. Usually go on netmums for this info. Glad I can get it here.
  47. 8 likes
    @Yes has been working hard n saved £150 and is seeing who he could 'have'.
  48. 8 likes
    How long have you been insane? When were you first diagnosed?
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    Cheeky fu**ing halal cows stealing our English cows jobs