gonna be a dad - UK-Muscle Body Building Community

Carlos901 · 23-05-2006, 10:46 PM

well for use that know me, to top everything off my x is now pregnant... got a phone call today out the blue saying she was pregnant etc but she couldnt talk cause she was at work, so i said well i want to talk about it so i met her from work, i was that shocked i didnt realy say much, she just said she was 9 weeks pregnant, i said when did u find out, she said 3 weeks ago i was like why didnt u tell me then? she said i was gonna get an obortion but then i changed my mind, and she even said i wasnt gonna tell you but my dad said i had to? i was like what the ****? by this time my head was in bits... so i got home and sent a txt saying can we sit down and talk about it proply? she said whats there to talk about, im 9 weeks pregnant, im not gonna get back with you, you will have the right to see the kid. and that was it? i sent one back saying i wouldnt get back with you, i just want whats best for the kid etc etc, and work stuff out with her, and she hasnt replied... ohh god, i cant wait till this year is out, cause this realy hasnt bean my year

dynamatiz · 23-05-2006, 10:59 PM

short but sweet mate

are you sure its yours ?

and a dna test wouldnt go a miss

but glad to haer you would take responsibilty on your new arrival(if its yours mate)

but keep your head up bro, no matter what dont let anything get you, be positive and the rest of the year, does wonders imo

and by the way mate congratulations

Carlos901 · 23-05-2006, 11:04 PM

yeh its mine, if she says 9 weeks, thats when we went to glasgow

**hackskii** · 23-05-2006, 11:25 PM

Oh man as if you didnt have enough problems losing your job and girlfriend.
Geez man, you really know how to live on the edge.

Let gramps say a few things here.
First off my daughter 6 was a mistake.
I think of it as a mistake due to the fact I didnt want kids but she did and I was not using protection, bingo an unwanted pregnancy (by me).
I held alot of resentment to her to not clueing me in that she wanted to have a baby, and my dumb ass wasnt thinking with my big head but the little one.

But now later on down the road, I love my daughter and am very glad I have her. Now I am 46 with a 6 year old.
I bet if I didnt have a child by the Mom then I would never have one.
Now I am glad and feel blessed.
Actually feel a bit bad due to the fact I kind of wanted an abortion. Thinking back I would have missed out on one of the coolist things I will ever have.
Now I actually kind of want another (note to self watch out what you wish for) but thinking with my big head now know this is not in the cards.

So, good luck, be in your childs live and spend as much time as you can for the sake of your child.

Carlos901 · 24-05-2006, 12:06 AM

yeh a bad year, i lost my job, was in debt with the bank had no ways of paying it back, lost my girlfriend, and my mate hung him self all in the same week, now this.....

Lord Lucan · 24-05-2006, 12:24 AM

carlos me an my ex broke up because she was pregnant she didn't want it and i did
we didnt speak for bout 2 weeks and even when we did start speakin again it wasn't for long but we have managed to work things out and it is alot easier and things are alot better between us now!
her hormones will be up the wall at the moment giv her a while to come round because despite her saying she only told you because her dad told her to if she didn't want you to know she wouldn't have told you!!
if she lets you go to the scans or anything like that then go because any resentment you both have towards eachother will go away when you see what the BOTH of you have created!!
keep your head up!! don't look back on the bad things that have happened look forward to bein a dad!! and worst comes to the worst get a job in a call centre until you can find something better as even a $h*t job is better than no job!!

dynamatiz · 24-05-2006, 12:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Carlos901

yeh its mine, if she says 9 weeks, thats when we went to glasgow

i would check to be sure bro

nut if you are certain, congratulations once again mate

**hackskii** · 24-05-2006, 01:22 AM

Oh yah, get the DNA test as I have been accused of having a child, my last name on her birth certificate and I was never the dad.
The test proved I wasnt.

She did that because I have a good job.
What a loser.

**Great White** · 24-05-2006, 08:44 AM

Sorry mate, I dont fully understand if she is getting an abortion or not?

How do you feel about an abortion?

Not being funny mate, and dont take this the wrong way at all, but are you in any stable position to be bring up a child?

You say you want what is best for the sprog, do you think, if she keeps it, you can offer it that?

Ironman · 24-05-2006, 10:18 AM

You cant just abort a baby because its an inconvience - this baby should kick you up the ass to get things sorted so you can contribute to it being supported and being the best Dad that you can. Its unfortunate the way its turned out but you have to find a common ground with your ex, get viisitation rights sorted. Things may seem a bit sh1t now but a few years down the line when everythings settled you will have a son or daughter and he/she will be the best thing that ever happened to you.

Tatyana · 24-05-2006, 10:27 AM

Children are a blessing, and really, I don't think there are any accidents in this world.

SO CONGRATULATIONS!

Big Cyber Hug CARL

x
x
x
T

chrisj22 · 24-05-2006, 01:01 PM

I am out of a job and my girlfriend is 6 and a half months pregnant - times are hard but I will ALWAYS buy my child something before me. It winds me up when people say 'I'm skint ' and you know full well that they've got £600-7-- sitting in their bank as spare cash. I'm not going to lie, I literally am struggling - Fcuk, if I didnt have my parents my child would have nothing.

I've always worked in good, well paid jobs, and where I am from, at the moment there are no decent jobs going. If I was to take a job with a poor wage I would then be in a worse position because I would NOT be able to earn enough to pay the bills, keep my child warm (when it's born) and stop my partner worrying as she is in such a vulnerable position at the moment.

Keep your chin up pal - My baby was 'unplanned' but that is our responsibility and it does not give anyone the right to abort a child who in the first place did not ask to be on this earth.........

Cheater2K · 24-05-2006, 01:16 PM

Carlos, i was in a sort of the same situation as you 13 months ish, except i was homless, in debt and all sorts, now i have an 8 month old boy, house and a reasonably good job. It all works out in the end, although i am still with my mrs as i took it upon myself to support both her and my little one.

Things do get you down somtimes, and they do always come at once, thats my experiances anyway, but on the plus side, things can only really get better cant they?? I cant see them getting much worse

Mikey · 24-05-2006, 02:08 PM

Though it probably sounds insensitive, and goes against the grain of the last few posts, if there is even the slightest doubt in your mind that the child isn't yours (and I can see why there might be considering the circumstances) I'd ask for a DNA test.

Your ex won't like you for it, but it doesn't seem like there is much of a relationship there anyway at the moment, but a child is a huge responsibility and, depending on how things pan out, your ex can claim up to a third of your salary in child support until the child is 18.

Best to get it sorted out asap if that is of concern.

On the other hand, if you are happy that the child is yours then it is probably best not to rock the boat as, if she is so inclined, your ex will only start to cause problems regarding contact if you cause her problems over paternity.

Either way, have your position clear in your head early on, if you start to deviate later it will be that much more difficult sorting things out (and will probably end up going to court which won't do either of you (or the child) any good at all).

**Great White** · 24-05-2006, 02:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mikey

if there is even the slightest doubt in your mind that the child isn't yours (and I can see why there might be considering the circumstances) I'd ask for a DNA test.

Just wait untill its born.

If it comes out a different colour, or cries in a different language, you`ll save yourself and her the upset of having to ask

23-05-2006, 10:46 PM	#1 (permalink)
Carlos901 Legend Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 1,766	gonna be a dad well for use that know me, to top everything off my x is now pregnant... got a phone call today out the blue saying she was pregnant etc but she couldnt talk cause she was at work, so i said well i want to talk about it so i met her from work, i was that shocked i didnt realy say much, she just said she was 9 weeks pregnant, i said when did u find out, she said 3 weeks ago i was like why didnt u tell me then? she said i was gonna get an obortion but then i changed my mind, and she even said i wasnt gonna tell you but my dad said i had to? i was like what the ****? by this time my head was in bits... so i got home and sent a txt saying can we sit down and talk about it proply? she said whats there to talk about, im 9 weeks pregnant, im not gonna get back with you, you will have the right to see the kid. and that was it? i sent one back saying i wouldnt get back with you, i just want whats best for the kid etc etc, and work stuff out with her, and she hasnt replied... ohh god, i cant wait till this year is out, cause this realy hasnt bean my year __________________

23-05-2006, 11:04 PM	#3 (permalink)
Carlos901 Legend Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 1,766	yeh its mine, if she says 9 weeks, thats when we went to glasgow __________________

23-05-2006, 11:25 PM	#4 (permalink)
hackskii UK-Muscle Moderator Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Sunny Southern California U.S.A. Posts: 23,185	Oh man as if you didnt have enough problems losing your job and girlfriend. Geez man, you really know how to live on the edge. Let gramps say a few things here. First off my daughter 6 was a mistake. I think of it as a mistake due to the fact I didnt want kids but she did and I was not using protection, bingo an unwanted pregnancy (by me). I held alot of resentment to her to not clueing me in that she wanted to have a baby, and my dumb ass wasnt thinking with my big head but the little one. But now later on down the road, I love my daughter and am very glad I have her. Now I am 46 with a 6 year old. I bet if I didnt have a child by the Mom then I would never have one. Now I am glad and feel blessed. Actually feel a bit bad due to the fact I kind of wanted an abortion. Thinking back I would have missed out on one of the coolist things I will ever have. Now I actually kind of want another (note to self watch out what you wish for) but thinking with my big head now know this is not in the cards. So, good luck, be in your childs live and spend as much time as you can for the sake of your child. __________________ "Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away." - George Carlin Scott To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

24-05-2006, 12:06 AM	#5 (permalink)
Carlos901 Legend Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 1,766	yeh a bad year, i lost my job, was in debt with the bank had no ways of paying it back, lost my girlfriend, and my mate hung him self all in the same week, now this..... __________________

24-05-2006, 12:24 AM	#6 (permalink)
Lord Lucan the sparrow never lands were the tiger roams Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: somewere in the pacific with a bikini clad destiny's child runin round Posts: 680	carlos me an my ex broke up because she was pregnant she didn't want it and i did we didnt speak for bout 2 weeks and even when we did start speakin again it wasn't for long but we have managed to work things out and it is alot easier and things are alot better between us now! her hormones will be up the wall at the moment giv her a while to come round because despite her saying she only told you because her dad told her to if she didn't want you to know she wouldn't have told you!! if she lets you go to the scans or anything like that then go because any resentment you both have towards eachother will go away when you see what the BOTH of you have created!! keep your head up!! don't look back on the bad things that have happened look forward to bein a dad!! and worst comes to the worst get a job in a call centre until you can find something better as even a $h*t job is better than no job!! __________________ The strength of the wolf is in the pack! It is better to die standing up than to live on your knees!

23-05-2006, 10:59 PM	#2 (permalink)
dynamatiz work in progress Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: north of england but mama doesnt know where a came from.summit about a pack of wolves Posts: 313	short but sweet mate are you sure its yours ? and a dna test wouldnt go a miss but glad to haer you would take responsibilty on your new arrival(if its yours mate) but keep your head up bro, no matter what dont let anything get you, be positive and the rest of the year, does wonders imo and by the way mate congratulations

24-05-2006, 01:22 AM	#8 (permalink)
hackskii UK-Muscle Moderator Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Sunny Southern California U.S.A. Posts: 23,185	Oh yah, get the DNA test as I have been accused of having a child, my last name on her birth certificate and I was never the dad. The test proved I wasnt. She did that because I have a good job. What a loser. __________________ "Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away." - George Carlin Scott To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

24-05-2006, 08:44 AM	#9 (permalink)
Great White Sexy Moderator Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: United Kingdom Posts: 9,249	Sorry mate, I dont fully understand if she is getting an abortion or not? How do you feel about an abortion? Not being funny mate, and dont take this the wrong way at all, but are you in any stable position to be bring up a child? You say you want what is best for the sprog, do you think, if she keeps it, you can offer it that? __________________ Welcome to Uk-Muscle.co.uk "I was born perfect, and just like the great white shark, have never had to evolve!" To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. - Hardcore Bodybuilding & Powerlifting Community! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. - Bodybuilding & Sports Video Sharing Community!

24-05-2006, 10:18 AM	#10 (permalink)
Ironman Sculpting the masterpiece Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 1,464	You cant just abort a baby because its an inconvience - this baby should kick you up the ass to get things sorted so you can contribute to it being supported and being the best Dad that you can. Its unfortunate the way its turned out but you have to find a common ground with your ex, get viisitation rights sorted. Things may seem a bit sh1t now but a few years down the line when everythings settled you will have a son or daughter and he/she will be the best thing that ever happened to you.

24-05-2006, 10:27 AM	#11 (permalink)
Tatyana My name is EARL Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: On my bloody bike doing cardio Posts: 3,463	Children are a blessing, and really, I don't think there are any accidents in this world. SO CONGRATULATIONS! Big Cyber Hug CARL x x x T

24-05-2006, 01:01 PM	#12 (permalink)
chrisj22 An absolute fat bastard Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: T'up North Posts: 3,211	I am out of a job and my girlfriend is 6 and a half months pregnant - times are hard but I will ALWAYS buy my child something before me. It winds me up when people say 'I'm skint ' and you know full well that they've got £600-7-- sitting in their bank as spare cash. I'm not going to lie, I literally am struggling - Fcuk, if I didnt have my parents my child would have nothing. I've always worked in good, well paid jobs, and where I am from, at the moment there are no decent jobs going. If I was to take a job with a poor wage I would then be in a worse position because I would NOT be able to earn enough to pay the bills, keep my child warm (when it's born) and stop my partner worrying as she is in such a vulnerable position at the moment. Keep your chin up pal - My baby was 'unplanned' but that is our responsibility and it does not give anyone the right to abort a child who in the first place did not ask to be on this earth.........

24-05-2006, 01:16 PM	#13 (permalink)
Cheater2K EFBB Winner Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: North Wales, UK Posts: 5,665	Carlos, i was in a sort of the same situation as you 13 months ish, except i was homless, in debt and all sorts, now i have an 8 month old boy, house and a reasonably good job. It all works out in the end, although i am still with my mrs as i took it upon myself to support both her and my little one. Things do get you down somtimes, and they do always come at once, thats my experiances anyway, but on the plus side, things can only really get better cant they?? I cant see them getting much worse __________________ Kind Regards Cheater **************************** ( To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. ) (MSN: To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. ) (URL: www.comingsoon.com) ****************************

24-05-2006, 02:08 PM	#14 (permalink)
Mikey Newbie Trainer Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 47	Though it probably sounds insensitive, and goes against the grain of the last few posts, if there is even the slightest doubt in your mind that the child isn't yours (and I can see why there might be considering the circumstances) I'd ask for a DNA test. Your ex won't like you for it, but it doesn't seem like there is much of a relationship there anyway at the moment, but a child is a huge responsibility and, depending on how things pan out, your ex can claim up to a third of your salary in child support until the child is 18. Best to get it sorted out asap if that is of concern. On the other hand, if you are happy that the child is yours then it is probably best not to rock the boat as, if she is so inclined, your ex will only start to cause problems regarding contact if you cause her problems over paternity. Either way, have your position clear in your head early on, if you start to deviate later it will be that much more difficult sorting things out (and will probably end up going to court which won't do either of you (or the child) any good at all).

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread: