First time giving anyone advice here but I notice you aren't getting many responses.
In order to build muscle but not get massive, I reckon your calorie intake should be around 3000, only 500 more than the recommended daily intake.
Protein wise you should be taking 1.5 grams of protein per pound of body weight, that is ALOT of protein shakes, being a vegetarian it is going to be quite hard without meat.
Eat what you can with protein, nuts, dairy produce (full fat milk, cheese) stuff like that.
I hope this helped, take a look around the beginners articles on this forum, they will help you much more than I ever will be.
